


timeless

by hellevator_mp3



Series: college and chaos belong together, don't they? [3]
Category: NCT (Band), NU'EST, SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anyways, College, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, So yeah, but you don't have to read that to read this!, does this even count as angst tho?? i'm not sure, friends to lovers to strangers to lovers, that basically describes this whole thing, this is set before chaos and calamities!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 19:49:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18598219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hellevator_mp3/pseuds/hellevator_mp3
Summary: "i can’t do this anymore.  this-this hiding thing, not being able to tell my friends that i’m completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with you” the words kept running circles in taeyong’s head, long after his best friend and lover had walked away.  now, he could only hope that he could run fast enough in the future to catch him again.





	timeless

**Author's Note:**

> as usual, this is unbetaed because we die like men dflkghd uhhh if you see any mistakes or weird tenses, please let me know! 
> 
> just like chewing gum (or rather, ring pops) this is a prequel to show jaeyong's backstory for of chaos and calamities, but you can read it as a standalone story as well!

if anyone had asked what jaehyun’s plans were for the day, he surely wouldn’t have said “oh, nothing much, just studying biology alone with my ex because the rest of our group ditched us”. no, if it were up to him, he would be laying in bed watching reruns of his favorite show, or at the gym. he was skipping leg day to watch his ex pour a red bull into his already overly caffeinated drink and -- wait, what? 

jaehyun snapped back to the present just in time to hear the splash of the canned drink as it was poured into his iced coffee. with eyes round like saucers, jaehyun reached forward and grabbed at taeyong’s wrist, but not before the last dregs of the drink were spilled into his cup. for a moment, the two of them stared at each other and tried to ignore the energy pulsing between them. without a second thought, jaehyun withdrew his hand and watched as taeyong nonchalantly stirred the mixture, taking a sip, before chugging the whole thing down in one go. 

now, jaehyun had known taeyong since their freshman year. he had never seen him chug a cup of coffee or an energy drink that fast, nonetheless the two together. he pushed the thought aside as he instead focused on his notes, forcing himself off the thought that he didn't know taeyong like that anymore. 

they worked in near silence for a bit, going over their previously done work together with small comments here and there, correcting the form of a sentence or where a formula was written wrong. it took a while for the amount of caffeine to hit taeyong, and jaehyun paused for a second when he saw the other's hands beginning to shake. without saying a word, he got up and went to the counter, ordering taeyong’s favorite muffin, a banana, and a bottle of water. he hoped that the combination would help ease the way taeyong’s hands were shaking, and was mildly pleased with the look of surprise on taeyong’s face when he set the full plate on the table in front of him, directly over the notes that he was looking over. 

without a word said, jaehyun pulled their shared notes over to him, as well as the textbook that lay sideways between the two of them. he began to check over his notes, and then eventually pulled taeyong’s towards him as well, adding and taking out information wherever necessary as taeyong finished off the food and drink. 

by the time they left, there was a full set of notes for them to copy and print for the rest of their group, and they left one another in silence as they headed home. taeyong’s phone felt heavy with jaehyun’s number in it once more, along with the knowledge that it was saved under “jung jaehyun”, and not under one of the many nicknames that taeyong once had for him. 

\--

“you can’t just ignore it, jae.” johnny was the voice of reason a week later, sitting alongside yuta, who were two of jaehyun’s closest friends. “you have to tell him eventually.” jaehyun snorted, shoveling another mouthful of whatever slop lined his tray - meatloaf? pasta? the world may never know. he sure as hell didn’t.  
with one last glance across the cafeteria at the table where taeyong sat surrounded by his friends - their old friends - he smiled wistfully at johnny. “if only it was that easy, john. he wouldn’t listen to me anymore.” johnny and yuta shared a look, before returning to their lunches, gears already turning away in their minds. jaehyun pretended that he didn’t glance up at taeyong every once in a while, acting as if he was scrolling through social media instead. 

he couldn’t deny, however, the shiver that wracked his body when taeyong glanced back at him, with a strange look in his eyes that jaehyun couldn’t decipher. 

\--

across the canteen from jaehyun, taeyong was settled in between some of the members of his friend group. jonghyun (who insisted that they call him jr to set him apart from the other jonghyun’s in their school) sat to his left, with seungcheol to his right, followed immediately after by his two boyfriends, jeonghan and joshua. they were the only five there at the moment, leaving nearly half of the table empty. after receiving a text that the others wouldn’t be coming for lunch, taeyong and jr moved to the other side of the table, which gave both sets of people ample room to spread out. 

the only disadvantage was that this put jaehyun, who was across the canteen from him, directly into taeyong’s sight, and vice versa. taeyong listened idly to jeonghan talking about their plans for the weekend, his eyes drifting over to jaehyun without thinking about it. he must have spaced out, because joshua snapping his fingers in front of his face was the next thing he heard. “so are you gonna talk to him, or are you just gonna stare like a lovesick fool?” his tone was slightly snippy, but taeyong knew he meant nothing by it. 

in response, he sighed, resting his cheek on his folded hands that lay on the table. his verbal response came out muffled, and jr grabbed a small chunk of his hair and gently pulled him up. taeyong grimaced, letting a dramatic moan of pain slip through his lips. the sound attracted looks from other tables around them, but taeyong just wrenched jr’s fingers from his freshly dyed silver hair. “there's no reason to talk to him now. we're just partners in class, not partners in life.” he replied, his eyes drifting back to jaehyun - who turned almost at the same time, their eyes locking. 

when jaehyun finally broke his gaze, taeyong whispered “not anymore, at least.”

the other four shared a look, knowing what had to be done. 

\--

taeyong and jaehyun had known one another since they were teens, having gone to the same high school together and only getting together in their junior year. jaehyun knew that their relationship would be a secret for a while - taeyong wasn't yet out to his friends or family, while jaehyun was. that wasn’t a problem for jaehyun. he kept their physical contact short, only kissed taeyong behind locked doors, and never let his stare linger too long. for a year, that was enough to keep jaehyun sated. 

however, problems began popping up after their first anniversary, just as they were heading into their senior year of high school. they often had late night talks, saying that once they graduate they would room together in college and that would be that. maybe taeyong would be able to come out to his friends, then, since they were planning on furthering their education in a different city. they spent months and months studying for their exams, and saving up for application fees and down payments for a dorm - then it all went downhill. 

they went to a party together on a normal friday night, dressed to their best and walking with linked hands, but only as soon as they were out of sight of taeyong’s parents. jaehyun hadn’t been able to wipe the pleased smile off his face as he listened to taeyong blabber on about a new track he had been working on, not even when their hands naturally fell apart just before they arrived at the block that johnny, taeyong’s best friend, lived on. they could feel the vibrations of the music halfway down the street, the front door stood wide open and dancing bodies visible through the open space. the two didn’t even bother finding johnny, taeyong instead guiding jaehyun to the kitchen with a gentle hand on the small of his back. his touch was withdrawn as soon as they stepped into the significantly less crowded kitchen, and taeyong rifled through the fridge to find them two sodas to mix with one of the many bottles of alcohol lining the countertop. 

it wasn’t long before jaehyun was leaning into taeyong’s side on a long couch, drink held precariously in his hand and threatening to spill at any second. taeyong laughed at some joke that he told, grabbing the other’s drink before it could spill and leave a stain that johnny would never be able to explain. when jaehyun leaned forward to leave a small kiss on taeyong’s cheek, the elder pushed him away with wide eyes, motioning silently to the other people in the room. it was then that jaehyun truly realized the magnitude of their relationship, of the situation that they were in. taeyong watched in silence as jaehyun seemed to ice over, his mouth clamping shut as he scooted over to leave room between them. he snatched his drink back from taeyong, almost as an afterthought, and threw the rest of it back with no hesitation. taeyong could only watch as he got up and went to get another drink, stumbling back towards him with a half full drink a few moments later. it was only when jaehyun mumbled something about needing to go somewhere quieter that taeyong finally unfroze, gently grabbing his wrist and dragging him upstairs to one of the guest rooms that he had claimed as his own. 

after unlocking the door, he led jaehyun to the bed, and allowed him to sprawl all over the navy blue covers as he locked the door behind him, throwing his jacket off into the corner, and sitting down next to jaehyun. he looked over his boyfriend’s face, taking in every little detail. a bad feeling grew in the pit of his stomach, one that seemed all encompassing and like it would take over the world if it could. 

little did taeyong know, it soon would take over his world. 

drunk jaehyun was a filterless jaehyun, taeyong had found out over his time of knowing the other. therefore, it wasn’t a surprise when jaehyun began venting over the little things that had happened in his life, before suddenly jolting upright and staring at taeyong with a gaze that seemed to intense to be anything but sober - but the quiver of his lip and slur of his words was enough to let taeyong know that jaehyun was anything but sober. “why are we still doing this?” he muttered, words thick as they came over his tongue. taeyong’s voice came out gentle, asking what the problem was, and jaehyun just shook his head, seeming to change his train of thought. “i can’t do this anymore. this-this hiding thing, not being able to tell my friends that i’m completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with you” was the next thing out of his mouth. taeyong froze once more, only being able to watch as jaehyun got to his feet and bolted for the door, unlocking it quickly and slamming it shut behind him. taeyong went into overdrive, rushing towards the exit in search of jaehyun. the younger boy was nowhere to be found. 

\--

it didn’t take more than an hour of texting and calling jaehyun to realize that his texts and calls were no longer going through, and he couldn’t get a hold of him through other social media. the bold “you’ve been blocked by this person” on jaehyun’s twitter page sent a bolt of pain through his body as it finally sunk in that this was it. this was the end of the best thing that had ever happened to him. 

jaehyun had even gone so far as to transfer schools to avoid taeyong. it wasn’t a surprise, honestly, since most of jaehyun’s friends went to their rival school anyways. over a year and a half after the incident, taeyong had found himself sitting across from jaehyun for their project, and didn’t know how to deal with himself. 

\--

so how he, jaehyun, found himself standing in front of the door to taeyong’s dorm a few days later, he’d never know. all he knew was that the older had sent him a text, asking to meet in his room to go over part of their notes. jaehyun didn't question it, considering that they had a test next week over the notes that they had taken, and they needed to be perfect. jaehyun knocked lightly on the door, listening for the telltale sound of feet coming towards him. the door swung open, taeyong standing behind it with black dye on his head, and one of his stained gloves pulled off so he wouldn't stain the door handle. he motioned for jaehyun to come in, telling him to ignore the smell that lingered in the dorm. 

jaehyun looked around a little, seeing familiar photos and decorations that taeyong had brought from home. he felt a pang in his heart as he saw a particular frame that still housed a photo of them from one of their trips to the park in their younger days. all thoughts of taking notes and revising left his brain at the sight. taeyong noticed his gaze, laughing a little when he saw what had caught jaehyun’s attention. “even after all these years and all we’ve been through, i still can’t get rid of it.” he mumbled, eyes flickering up to meet jaehyun’s, who had been watching him closely. jaehyun’s gaze drifted back to the photo, his feet slowly following suit as he reached out for the frame, picking it up gently and gazing at the photo inside. it was probably from middle school, given that they both had their natural hair colors - they had both dyed their hair in high school - and they had their arms wrapped around one another. jaehyun remembered the day it was taken, not in specifics, but in feelings. he remembered the feeling of the sun on their back, of the burn he got on his knee from sliding down the slide and rolling off the end (the burn that taeyong kissed, because he swore it would make it better), he remembers the feel of taeyong’s squishy cheeks under his hands as he teased him. 

“can we talk about it?” jaehyun uttered, his voice shaking slightly as the memories brought back a torrent of feelings that he thought he had covered up. taeyong replied with a small ‘yes’, causing jaehyun to let out a shaky breath and set the photo down, turning to taeyong before he could lose his nerve. “it was true, what i said that day, about being completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with you. it’s still true, as much as i wish it wasn’t.” he let out a sad laugh, before his head tilted down so taeyong could no longer see his face. “i regretted it the moment i said it, the moment i walked out, and i’ve regretted it since.” taeyong barely caught the rest of his sentence as his voice slowly tapered off, and jaehyun watched his feet come into view before taeyong was throwing his slender body into jaehyun’s arms, grasping tightly at him. 

he could hear taeyong breathe a sigh of relief. “i regretted it too, not holding you back, that is. i watched you walk out of the door and out of my life and didn’t do a damn thing about it, and i’ve regretted it since then. and i’m sorry for never telling my friends, at least.” taeyong murmured into jaehyun’s shoulder, where his face had inevitably ended up buried. jaehyun was shocked, to say the least, as he slowly wrapped his arms around taeyong’s small frame and pulled him closer. 

that is, until taeyong’s dye wet hair touched his cheek and he jumped back with a small shout, causing taeyong to drop to his knees and laugh. he watched as taeyong bustled off to rinse his hair out, coming back with water wet hair this time, drying it off with a towel. when he was done, he used the towel to wipe off the dye from jaehyun’s face, although it still left a blue mark. even after he had wiped the dye from jaehyun’s face, his hand lingered, and before they knew it, they had locked eyes and were leaning in, eyes fluttering shut and their lips about to meet --

then a door slammed not even ten feet away, and they jolted apart. a glance to the side revealed jeonghan, taeyong’s roommate, standing in the doorway. he stuttered out an apology, alongside a sneaky glance at taeyong, whose face was flushed red. 

the two of them burst out laughing as soon as the door clicked closed, leaning on one another for support as they laughed until their lungs hurt. it was then, and only then, that they finally shared their first kiss in close to two years - jaehyun’s hands settled on taeyong’s waist, and taeyong’s arms around jaehyun’s neck. it was like time had never passed as they settled into a rhythm, their bodies pressed together and hearts beating in sync, it seemed. 

\--

the first time they sat together with all of their friends, it was nothing short of awkward. seungcheol and his two boyfriends had staked their claim on three consecutive seats, leaving taeyong and jaehyun to sit next to each other, while johnny and yuta sat next to them. johnny had also dragged along his new boyfriend, ten, who was coincidentally on the same dance team as taeyong. 

and jr? oh, he sat between all the loving couples, silently gagging and making faces back and forth with yuta, the only other single person at the table.

**Author's Note:**

> feel free to yell at me on [tumblr](https://hellevator-mp3.tumblr.com/) or [twitter](https://twitter.com/wave_mp3)!


End file.
